13 Wild Swingers Myths – Debunked!

13 Wild Swingers Myths - Debunked!

With the swiftly growing popularity of swinging and getting into the swingers lifestyle we hear a multitude of wild swingers myths via social media and mainstream media alike. Here are 13 widely spread swingers myths that you may have heard but are beyond belief once you know the swinging facts!

Swinger Myth #1 – Only Old People Are Swingers

Far from the truth! This writer’s personal experience was that we became swingers when we were in our early 20’s. Throughout our 25 or so years we have seen every age group represented, in numbers, at events and parties that we have attended. Swingers are all ages and this is widely due to the debunking of swingers myths like this one.

Swingers Myth #2 – The Chance Of Contracting An STI While Swinging Is Huge

Simply false. STI (or to some STD) testing is not only common amongst swingers, it is promoted and encouraged by the community as a whole. The likelihood of coming across someone who does in fact have an STI outside of the swingers community is likely higher as they are less likely to get periodically tested. This is one of those swingers myths that is insidious and promoted by those that are not open minded we feel.

Swingers Myth #3 – Swinging Promotes Cheating

It’s not cheating if your spouse knows, and participates! Swingers do not need to go down the deceitful path of cheating due to having the open honest communication, and permission, to participate in extramarital affairs. Why would you be allowed at the buffet and still want to go out for a side sandwich??? Doesn’t make a whole lot of sense does it! This is on of the more funny swingers myths we feel based on the reality of the swinging lifestyle.

Swingers Myth #4 – Swingers Marriages Are Unstable

Actually swingers typically have much more stable marriages than most. Swingers core values revolve around open honest communication, being explicit about wants, needs and desires AND seeking avenues to be more open minded. Swingers marriages as a broad statement have the formula for success based on the fact that they willingly want to participate in conscience communication and breakthroughs. How many non swingers marriages can you say do that?

Swingers Myth #5 – Swingers Will Have Sex With Anyone

Ummm no! Just because you can doesn’t mean you will! All swingers have desire lists of what works for them when it comes to attraction, the same as a non-swinger. Just because you are at an orgy doesn’t mean you need to play with everyone on the bed, in what reality would that be a thing! Boundaries are a tenant of swinging and every swinger has their own set of boundaries

Swingers Myth #6 – Swinging Is Always The Husbands Idea

Not from my experience and from many I know! Getting into the swingers lifestyle can come from many inspirations and typically is a goal of both participants once the conversation has been broached. There are a variety of reasons people get into swinging and it is up to both partners to talk about it and ensure they are getting into it for mutually beneficial reasons.

Swingers Myth #7 – Only Hetrosexual Couples Are Swingers

Sexuality and partnership dynamics have nothing to do with who swingers are. Anyone can be a swinger regardless of if they are single, in a triad or couple or what the identity of the composition of the group is. One of the beautiful things about swinging and swingers is the open minded perspective the majority has when it comes to who and what swingers are.

Swingers Myth #8 – All Female Swingers Are Bisexual

Nope. Just because you swing does not mean you need to play a certain way. Attraction and sexuality are core aspects of who a swinger is… would you assume all men who swing are bi? Probably not – so why would you think women would be?

Swingers Myth #9 – Swinging Will Hurt Your Relationship

Swinging puts a microscope on your relationship ten fold. If you are actively working on improving your relationship then you can expect that ten fold experience when it comes to improving it when you are a swinger. Like any relationship, both intimate or otherwise, if you are not putting the work in to make it better and stronger each and everyday cracks will begin to appear and that microscope will magnify those as well.

Swingers Myth #10 – Swingers Try To Convert Everyone They Meet

Sorry to burst your myth bubble on this one but this is far from the truth. Do you expect everyone you meet to have the same passion or interest in everything you do? No! So why would you assume swingers are always tempting people to the “dark side” (even though we do have the best cookies). Swingers by far are some of the most discreet people you will meet, trust me, they don’t want to convert every single person they come across… maybe just the ones they think are hot!

Swingers Myth #11 – You Can Recognize A Swinger By Certain Items

Yes and No on this one – A black ring on the right hand ring finger is widely known as a symbol of an open relationship. Upsidedown pineapple symbols are also gaining popularity in this respect as well… but with those two more noticeable symbols there are dozens of myth ones as well. Don’t assume any symbol represents anything but do take the opportunity to strike up a conversation if you do see a likely symbol, and you are interested!

Swingers Myth #12 – Swinging Will Improve Your Relationship

This can be the case and it can also be the opposite if you are not working on it daily – just like any other relationship dynamic. Swinging forces you to seek out better communication and to dive deep into a better understanding of yourself. Swinging also brings people together who are on similar paths so having open honest conversations becomes much easier. If you are not into the swingers lifestyle for the right reasons you likely won’t be doing this though so the chances of it damaging your relationship becomes real. Just do the work, you will be better for it.

Swingers Myth #13 – There Is A Certain Way To Be A Swinger

Nope, there isn’t and this is another one of those swingers myths. That’s like saying only a certain type of icecream is right. Swingers can be anyone, can partake in the swingers lifestyle any way they wish and can change their direction whenever they choose. One major thing we have noticed is that your wants and desires change as you grow as a person and learn from those around you. Don’t put yourself in a labeled box – be open to the growth that is before you as you dive deep into the swingers lifestyle!


Like anything and everything swingers myths exist but once you do some research many are easily debunked. If you are interested in an opening up of your relationship or as a solo exploration go into it with an open mind and without judgement and let the journey guide you. You will have an amazing realization of what the swingers world looks like once you do.

Finally – if you read about it or hear about it do look it up before you believe it. Swingers Myths can be true or false and it’s up to you to do your due diligence!